The Seasons

Where to start...  We have had family and friends here now on and off for the last month, which mostly has been wonderful, yet tiring.  The hardest person to deal with is the Man who just likes his home quiet and simple, with a houseful of guests and many kids this made him grumpy!!!!!  However, when the house is back to normal he says he misses the company and bussle!!! Can't win really.  We have just said to goodbye to the Aussies and will see them again in two weeks, the time went to fast for me but one really joyful things was watching two little girls make a deep and happy bond, two 5 year olds who couldn't be more different in their personalities just clicked it was magical.Also seeing cousins slip into each others lives so easily as if they see them all the time.

Today has been about planning the autumn, we made a Christmas box of films, stories and music and set aside to gradually fill over the next few months.  The kids made cake, spent hours making knights and footballers out of tin foil and card, we watched the Waltons (fab), and I pottered around plotting autumn harvesting, thinking of woolly socks and mittens, still blistering hot here though.  

Back to work in the morning and something that we feel we need to make part of our lives is structure, not rigid rules but a gentle sequence throughout our week, as we are tired and unorganised at the moment.  So we really are going back to basics:  Bath nights, cleaning day/laundry and baking day, monday morning coffee to discuss our work, meals at 7pm bed at 8.30 for the kids etc etc

Hope to upload photos soon but have to use another pc to do this - very annoying.  xx

Angels & Demons

I am sure we must all have them, those nasty little devils that sneak into our thoughts and wreck our concentration, disturb our peace of mind or generally play havoc with our sense of wellbeing, but mine have been on a total destruct mission lately.  My demons mostly appear in the forms of low self worth, zero self esteem, lack of trust, feeling I am not good enough (mother, writer, wife etc) but sometimes they jump up and bite me on the bum and make me feel really bad.  Last week my nasty old demon of 'panic' appeared, the horrible gremlin that attacks me on high bits of road, in busy streets and on long bridges, I literally feel as if the road is crumbling beneath me and that I am falling and am going to die. Totally daft and very upsetting, I haven't felt this way for 2 years now,  then here it was back again, so on reflection I feel I was exhausted that day, thinking of too many things and now allowing time for relaxation, reflection and me-time.

So now I am back to putting my life in order, time for work, time for kids, time for my man and time for me, I am going to carefully balance where my energy is spent and gently re-shift the priorities back to health, love, happiness, nature etc.

Grounding myself physically and emotionally, I have been worried about not feeling secure in this house as it is so expensive but am always scared of upheaval, however, now does feel the time to move on (locally) nearer school and Siena which we all love.  So we have been looking at areas we would like to live in, discussing options and now feeling more positive about things.

I am working every other day now for the rest of the summer, in order to enjoy time with the kids and we have family here on Thursday so a busy few weeks in store.  Today the sun is bright, the flowers thirsty, my daughter has made bread which is rising on the table in the garden, I have a lovely bottle of Chianti set aside for supper time (a gift from Nonna), and a little gluten free cake for pudding, so a gentle evening ahead x

Honey and Rosemary bread, figs from the garden

 

Birthday icecream in Siena

Sunny Siena

Poor Daddy